I was tired and fed up, there was no going back on my decision, my mind was made up and I was ready to go all the way to make this break up a reality, Stanley was a wonderful man, really nice person, caring and really very understanding but of what good is a wonderful man if he is not showing signs he’s ready to marry you four years into a relationship.

I had given Stanley enough signs to let him know I was ready to be his wife, even though he lost his job as a bank teller two years after our relationship started and two years after the job loss I still remained with him, but for how long was I to wait hoping a new job would come for him, I wasn’t getting any younger and I was keeping so many eligible men away from me because of Stanley but all that was coming to an end today.
I left my house and headed for Stanley’s place so I can cordially break up with him little did I know Stanley had other plans and the break up never happened, few weeks preceding the break up I’d change my attitude and I was no longer as cheerful and excited as I used to be when I was with Stanley and all the time he asked me what the problem was, my response was always nothing, or what was I supposed to say? Tell him I wanted him to marry me? Of course I couldn’t do that.

Naturally I will have called Stanley before I leave for his house when things are still rosy, but not today, I just wanted to get this over with, I got to his place and I was glade enough not to come across any neighbor just so I won’t exchange pleasantries, I was in no mood for that. I knocked on the door as gently as possible and I got no response, I soon started banging on the door loudly yet no response and my thought immediately switch to the direction of ‘’what if Stanley was with another girl’’, well that will make the break up feel even better, I brought out my own keys unlock the door and headed straight for his bedroom and there I got the shock of my life, Stanley wasn’t with another girl as I thought, Stanley was dead, he was hanging by his neck, I ran out of the house screaming for neighbors.

Neighbors soon come in and attended to the body, cutting it down from the ceiling, I sat there and wept uncontrollably to think I’d come to break up with Stanley only to meet his dead body made me feel really guilty. One of the neighbors taped me and handed over a piece of paper to me, it turned out that Stanley had planned a suicide note before killing himself, it reads;

‘’I’m sorry for not saying goodbye, I’m sorry it had to end like this, I saw it coming and I could not live with it, your change of attitude said it all, the coldness that exuded from you made it all the more obvious, you were tired of waiting for me and I couldn’t imagine my life without you in it. I should have taken what was coming as a man but I couldn’t, leaving the way I did makes it all easier for you, don’t blame yourself for my actions, I take responsibility, I hope you will find happiness with a man that will love you more than I ever did, one that will love you enough to stay with you no matter what’’.
I wept bitterly and uncontrollably after reading the note, wishing I had acted differently, but what was I to do? What would you have done?